If a tree gets re-elected in a forest with no one running against it, does it make so much as a ripple on the public’s sonar?
Well never fear, dear Tennesseans; now hear this. Gov. Bill Haslam may have dodged an underdog bid by Sara Kyle, but he has a challenger in Mark “Coonrippy” Brown, a Gallatin resident whose pet raccoon has been confiscated by the Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency (TWRA); and who, by way of this offense, says he ought to be the next governor of Tennessee.
I couldn’t have summarized a reaction to this story any better than Betsy Phillips did, so here’s a pithy morsel to show you why:
What good is the right to petition your government for the redress of grievances if the government just doesn’t bother to respond? If you want a job where you can just ignore the dude who showers with his raccoon, then don’t get a government job. Otherwise, yeah, if a dude writes to request a permit, he should at least get an answer, even if that answer is “No.” If he can get 60,000 signatures, then it’s not unreasonable for someone in the Governor’s office to open the damn petition.
And here’s the brand-new voter guide page. Updates will be made as additional candidates (if any) become known.
Full disclosure: as a teenager, I and my family had a pet raccoon for a number of months. We eventually gave her to a wildlife rescue agency who could properly care for an adult, wild-born, orphaned raccoon. But she was precious as a baby, and my momma has pictures of her playing with an orange tabby kitten to prove it.